Projecting....

The aftermath of what happened at Xander's previous daycare center has effected not only Xander, but myself as well. A few weeks after pulling him from his previous daycare, where he had been going since he was 1.5 years old, I realized that I was going to have to choose another daycare or something equivalent soon. I was nervous for him-I wasn't sure if he would adjust well, I was afraid he would be forever afraid of any schooling situation.

Initially I looked into nanny services. I felt like Xander would do much better with one on one care and also it would work out better since my schedule isn't always 9-5. Unfortunately having a nanny isn't an affordable option at this point. Consequently I checked into daycare centers in the area and made some appointments. Ultimately deciding on a center in Ann Arbor.

Leaving your child with anyone is always a little unsettling, especially when they are basically strangers. Xander wasn't super excited about going and during the first few visits was especially clingy with myself or Tony. He's old enough now that he talks about his day more and speaks of specific teachers. While I know he would rather be home with Mommy or Daddy, he seems to be adjusting slowly but surely.

There was a moment when I decided I was going to take him out again, based on nothing but over protectiveness and my own scars from his past daycare experience and my distaste for public schools. Tony had a moment of clarity and pointed out to me that we had no reason to suspect any wrong doings at this new place and to give Xander a little more time to adjust. He also made the point that Xander isn't going to get use to a school environment with class room structure if he isn't exposed to it.

Fair enough.

I pick him up from daycare Monday and what do I find? A little boy with lots of mosquito bites and slightly soiled underpants that are on backwards. Turns out they don't treat the play ground, which is near a marshy area, for mosquitos. I also found out that Xander has been giving them a hard time about helping him when it's potty time.

So I communicated and hopefully neither of those things will happen again.

Notice I said I "communicated". I didn't overreact and leave to never return. Yeah....that was difficult to do to tell you the truth.

None of those things comes close to being as awful as finding out that your 4 year old child was physically attacked by another 4 year old child that obviously has emotional issues only to be told that your child is " a passive child and needs to learn how to deal with these kinds of things because when he goes to public school there's going to be more of the same."

Brilliant, right?

Despite the itchies and backwards undies Xander seems to be adjusting and starting to have a good time at his new daycare. Maybe he's realizing that you can't always be in control of everything and so long as you communicate and don't loose your patience situations that you may initially be leery of can become valuable and wonderful experiences.

Or that may be me projecting a thoroughly adult thought process onto a 4 year old.

Either way, Xander's happy.....and above are some big huggy pictures, that Xander took,to prove it.